I'm 15 years old and recently my dad has been diagnosed with cancer. he has been given about 6 months to live and I have been feeling very depressed ever since the news. I never remember feeling too depressed before now but I have made a self diagnosis that I'm a manic depression. I go through very violent mood swings - curled up in a ball crying, then i'll confide in a loved one and I feel happy and in a good mood.
in my day to day life I will often feel tired and drowsy. some days I feel good, some normal, some very stressful. I have turned to Marijuana as a way to cope and get away from it all, it works great but I'm feeling like it's an addiction. My dad also has always had to deal with depression like myself, so my question is do you think im just deeply depressed or am I a manic depression?
hmm, tough situation, hgope yhou get beter
The only ones who can diagnose you with manic depression is a medical doctor with training in psychiatry. We are not doctors. You are not a doctor. it is normal for you to go through all sorts of ups and downs when you hear terrible news like your father is dying. if you are really worried about this go to a doctor. Otherwise just keep smoking your pot. My brother and my niece and nephew died suddenly in a car wreck and the only thing thing that got me through was smoking pot and doing hardcore pills that got me high as a kite. Do what you gotta do.
the M is a bad move. bad for your brain. get a grip. do the right thing. make him proud of you. don't cop out with drugs and whine.
Depression can be caused by two things : a hormonal imbalance in your brain (called clinical depression), and as a result of a traumatic event (called situational depression).
I believe you have situational depression, due to the stress and strain of your dad's diagnostic. In those events, your doctor can give medication (for the time needed) to help you deal with the stress/anger/anxiety/etc. but the best thing would be for you to find a therapy/support groupe. Allot of people are going through the same thing as you. (don't get me wrong here, I'm not saying your situation isn't serious). All I'm saying is that: it is a normal reaction to what you are living. The shock of the news brought on depression and as mentionned by others, you are also going through grief.
Call up crissis centers or ask at the hospital...some support groupe are out there and talking/taking things of your chest is going to help you allot. The fact that you are going through violent fases is because you are angry about the fact that you can't help your dad and you feel helpless/useless. but you're not! Love goes a long way and can make miracles! crying and switching moods is also a reaction expected to such news. go see your doctor, he'll be able to help you in these hard times.
As for using marijuana to cope, I did that to and believe me, in the long run it only makes things worst! First of all, there's the addiction that is bad...but also, you may feel relieved by smoking up at this time, but the truth is: it causes more paranoia, anxiety and will affect your mood swings allot more!! Take my word, I was a daily user for over 10 years !!(I've been clean/sober now for 7 months) Don't do the same mistake I did, marijuana is no solution to your situation!
I'm very sorry for your situation and give you all my sympathy. I know how hard it can be to see a loved one go through Cancer, I personally lived it when my boyfriend of the time was diagnosed with testicular cancer in stage 4. Doctors told us he had a 50/50 chance of surviving and that I had to prepare myself to the reality that he had about 4 to 6 months to live. he did intensive/harsh chemio. had to undergo very dangerous operations and, to make a long story short: that was 2 years ago and he's still alive today.
I'm not saying your situation (or your dad's situation) is the same but, sometimes doctors are wrong and positive thinking has helped allot of people overcome cancer and be in remission. if you want to, there is a site on the internet that will explain how it works and prove to you (or your dad) that it is possible to defy cancer. The site is : www.thesecret.tv . It's a small 30 min. video and it made wonders in my life! You can also find "The Secret" at book stores if you're interested on learning more how to use "The Secret". Mind power, or positive thinking as we call it, is very underrated and very power-full.
I hope I've helped you and good luck, stay strong...I know it's hard.
Best wishes 
Do I have Bipolar Disorder (Manic Depression)?
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