I'm thankful that he is not deployed, I don't know how I would handle that, but my boyfriend is in the Army and is across the country for several months. How can I avoid the depression while he is gone? Living in a seemingly empty apartment now, how can I fill the void that seems to suck the life right out of me? Any suggestions that avoid getting pets would be so helpful.
How do you avoid depression when a military boyfriend is away?
Posted by admin on August 22nd, 2011
Posted in Depression Q and A 
cheeeeeeat
I'de say just stay in touch, keep yourself busy, and it's not as bad as it seems a lot of other people have it worse.
get a new boyfriend and break it off before he gets home
get a hobby & a sex toy
When my husband is away, I keep myself busy. Very busy. Get a new job that requires you to work a lot of hours, throw yourself into a new hobby or two, or find other local military wives / girlfriends to spend time with.
When you keep yourself busy, you won't have near as much time to dwell on it and become depressed. The time will fly too, you'll see.
Join a gym, join a bowling league, volunteer at the VA Hospital.
from what I have seen during each of my deployments [I have done 17 deployments in my careers], is by drinking, or cheating, or dropping him.
Pray. Get a hobby. Spend time with friends and family...talk to them frequently. Treat yourself to something nice from time to time.
You keep busy. Sign up for some classes at the local college. Go to the gym, hang out with friends, meet some new friends. Life when he is away him should be just like life before him (with the exception of looking to meet someone). What did you do before you guys met? Didd you go bowling with friends? See a lot of movies? Just do anything and everything that sounds like fun and stay busy. You may even want to try something like taking a cooking class to be able to make new recipes to impress him when he gets back.
Just remember that sitting home crying does no one any good. He's not your life, he is a part of it. Make a point to get up every day with a good attitude that this day will be fun and make it happen.
If you plan on marrying him at a later date then you need to get used to being alone and getting along without him. Been there, doing that. That's what we wives do. It's not an easy life by any means. If you truly start sinking into depression see a counsleor right away to talk about it, not necessarily to get on meds. Just keep your options open and realize that you are 1 of many girlfriends/spouses that are surviving every day without having your man with you.
That depend on when he enlisted. If he enlisted before you two meet I don't know but if he enlisted after you met then you really need to re evaluate where you are on his list of priorities.
Here is an option you may not have thought of.
Marry him! Many of the benefits that he receives you will receive also. He may give you access to his bank account which will get rid of alot of stress and depression. It will both of you guys something to look forward to when he returns.
i would say that the way to avoid depression is find out where there are other women who have boyfriends,husbands,brothers and relatives in the military and try to have communication with them either by meeting somewhere for a get together by e-mails or by letters. since they are in the same boat as u it would make u feel better and they could probably give u great suggestions on what u can do. good luck.
write him emails at scheduled times or video mails...get some friends and go out and stop dwelling on the alone thing...there is plently of things to do to keep you busy...work, movies...read a book....gf dinners....volunteer somewhere .. babysit for other vet wives so they get a break ... ...sew...lots to do....keep busy and live your life...
Get a life. I don't mean that in a cruel way. I mean actually develop interests that are completely independent of his presence or absence. Figure out who you are and what you like to do. Be who you are and not a satellite that revolves around him.
I know this sounds a little corny, but what got me through my husbands first deployment in iraq was scrapbooking. In the end it made me so much more prouder of him, and really made me appreciate everything he's had to go through. Another way to keep from getting depressed, is know that he will come back for you. Just don't start counting down the days just yet. Hang in there. Good luck!
My husband left for basic training about four weeks ago. We were married for a grand total of one month before he left and I was totally devastated. He's been really good at mailing me letters every day and I always look forward to getting them, so it helps keep me sane to know he's doing okay.
My advice is to keep yourself busy. Volunteer, find a job or a hobby, take classes, go shopping, visit family or friends, read, write, anything to keep you mind off of it. It's hard at first, but it starts getting easier and time starts going by more quickly after a few weeks.
Don't forget to enjoy the small things while he's gone, too. Enjoy not having him hog the covers and watch whatever mindless television show you want to. Do anything, enjoy yourself and try to stay sane.
Sleep with his best friend! substitute with his neighbor, army buddy on leave, etc, depending on circumstances.
My boyfriend is gone for 6 months in the military right now, and i already have severe depression. so basically he's been gone for 3 months now and I tried to stay busy ALOT every day..i got a gym membership and everything, but yea it's hard, that's why i'm on here too actually, i understand what you're going through my boyfriend and i have been together 5 and a half years, a lot of people don't realize it's not that easy just to keep busy and do what u did before though. they're your life. but yea, try to keep busy though and just try to stay productive like the gym and being around family or friends. keep people close that care. it's going to be over before you know, i know this past 3 months has gone by ALOT faster than i thought it would